Toronto Mayor Has Best Excuse For Smoking Crack: Was In Drunken Stupor

A big shoutout this morning to Toronto Mayor Rob Ford for offering the best excuses for misbehavior.

Crack and booze: Toronto Mayor Rob Ford
LOVES to party. 

After months of allegations, you might have heard that he finally admitted that he smoked crack.  His excuse was precious: "I was in a drunken stupor."

Oh, that makes it OK, then.

Residents of most cities probably wouldn't like it if their mayor was in a "drunken stupor" but in Toronto, at least for Ford, the drunken stupor is a good thing, because it excuses him for the crack smoking.

Pretty much everybody in Toronto wants Ford to resign, because no city likes to have a laughing stock as mayor. But good ol' Ford says he's going to stay on and run for re-election in 2014. Hey, booze and crack is expensive, you need a job to pay for it all, right?

According to the Associated Press, the crack smoking isn't the only example of Fords, um, colorful behavior:

"Ford apologized over the weekend for excessive drinking. He said he should not have been "hammered" drunk in public when he appeared at a street festival in August, calling it "pure stupidity."

He also said he got "a little out of control" after St. Patrick's Day in 2012, when city hall security guards said they witnessed a "very intoxicated' Ford having trouble walking and swearing at aides.

The mayor has also been accused of making an obscene gesture from his car and texting while driving. In 2011, Ford angered the city's gay community by declining to attend Toronto's gay pride parade, breaking with tradition observed by three previous mayors.

Earlier this year, the mayor was fired from his cherished side-job as a volunteer high school football coach after he made disparaging remarks to a TV network about parents and their kids."

 I'm not sure sure Ford will win the 2014 election, but he does sound like the life of a frat party, no?

On the bright side, if you're looking for a job, head to Toronto and run for mayor. You don't even have to be qualified. If you don't stumble around in public in a drunken stupor, and are not a fan of crack cocaine, that's an improvement over Ford. 

Your lack of drunkenness and drug abuse might just get you elected.