Fear In Texas: The Great U.S. Invasion Of 2015!! EEEK!!!

A U.S. military map for the Jade Helm
military exercise in the American Southwest
this summer. Some paranoid Texans
think the government is going to
put them in concentration camps,
but probably not.  

Texans are bracing for an invasion of that great state by the U.S. military.

Um, yes, Texas is already part of the United States, like it or not, but some Tea Party and conspiratorial types are saying the military will invade anyway.

This all started from a long planned military exercise called Jade Helm 15.

Parts of the southwestern United States, including Arizona, New Mexico and Texas, will be stand-ins for rugged Middle Eastern terrain.

(As Gawker notes, they're using the Southwest for this exercise because you can't really train for a war against Iran inside Iran. They might object.)

The military exercise divides different areas of the Southwest into friendly and hostile areas, for the purposes of training. Texas is marked as "hostile"

That means, according to Tea Party kooks, that the military is going to take away everybody's guns, lock up the Christians, and, I don't know, make everybody get gay married or something.

A website called AllNewsPipeline has the scoop. It's on the Internet, so it has to be true. Here's what AllNewsPipeline tells us what's really going on:

"Numerous 'FEMA Domes' are being rushed to completion across the state of Texas in locations suchas Lumberton, Brownsville, Pancho Maples and Kingsville are raising alarms with many who view these structures as 'FEMA death domes' used to house insurgents following the red and blue list round up of gun owners, Christians and patriotic supporters of American and the U.S. Constitution."

The conspiracy wackadoodles say
Walmart is closing Texas stores to help
the government set up concentration camps.
Nope the stores are closing because they're
underperforming or need renovations.  

Adding fuel to the fire was the closure of six Walmarts in western Texas. And what do failed Walmarts have to do with the Great Invasion of 2015?

Walmart is saying the stores closed because nobody shopped there, or the stores need to be renovated, which sounds plausible.  But no! They're going to be detention camps for all them god fearin' Christuns being oppressed by that evil Muslim Jihadist Obama.

Or something like that.

All this Tea Party right wing conspiracy craziness would be good for just a chuckle, and then we would move on except for one thing:

People who should know better, who are in charge, are buying into this craziness. Or at least pandering to it.

Texas Gov. Greg Abbott said he has told the Commander of the Texas State Guard to monitor the millitary training exercise, so that the U.S. government doesn't get any ideas and kill all the Texas Christians and take their guns. Or something.

Rest assured, says Gov. Abbott, that the Texas State Guard will ensure that Texans'  "safety, constitutional rights, private property rights and civil liberties will not be infringed" by this evil U.S. invasion U.S. military exercise in the state.

The ever reliable Texas U.S. Rep. Louie Gohmert also chimed in. He's always fun to listen to with his extreme rhetoric, and he doesn't disappoint here:

"This military practice has some concerned that the U.S. Army is preparing for modern-day martial law. Certainly, I can understand these concerns.

When leaders within the current administration believe that major threats to the country include those who support the Constitution, are military veterans or even 'cling to guns or religion,' patriotic Americans have reasons to be concerned."

 Of course U.S soldiers, the ones participating in the military exercise are patriotic American citizens. Isn't it kind of insulting to think these fine soldiers would set up concentration camps or something to detain and kill other Constitution loving Americans?

Yep, but oh well.

It's no secret a lot of Texans, with all those conservatives, don't like President Obama, which is totally fair enough. NPR quoted former Texas Lt. Gov David Dewhurst as saying, "Unfortunately, some Texans have projected their legitimate concerns about the competence and trustworthiness of President Barack Obama on these noble warriors. This must stop."

Don't count on it stopping, Mr. Dewhurst.

That's because there's money to be made. All these conspiracy organizations need a source of income. If the U.S. "invasion" of Texas doesn't happen, then these whackadoodle groups can say they "prevented" it, and if need be, do a money beg to take advantage of it.

And the Texas governor's pandering, and Gohmert's babble around all this is just being pro business, right? Keep that conspiracy industry going. Plus, throwing red meat to this constituency won't hurt in future elections.