The Monthly Fail Report: November

Many months, I treat you to the latest compilation of filmed dumb mistakes for the past month. Here, I present you with one of many videos showing November's mishaps.

A typical scene in a Fail compilation video. Bicyclist
and skateboarders are particularly clumsy

The purpose of this, of course, is if you're having a moment when you're feeling pretty stupid, you can watch the video and feel better about yourself, at least by comparison.

I've noticed most of these fail compilations, including this one, have a disproportionate number of bicycle and skateboard mishaps. I'd like a study on why this is so

Are bicycle and skateboard tricksters more likely to be stupid? Or just more likely to be filmed? Or do other people who do dumb things manage to avoid being the target of a video, while bicycle and skateboard people embrace the glory of having their failings out there for the world to see? And just who pays their medical bills.

While you're pondering all those questions, go ahead and watch the eight minutes of stupidity on this month's video:

Dancing Queen of the Treadmill

I love the woman in this viral video. In an effort to heal an injured knee and be creative, the woman featured in the video below has found a way to make a supremely tedious treadmill workout fun.

I hate treadmills. The scenery doesn't change and time seems to stand still. I'd rather run outside. But I might want to learn Nicole Harris' moves. The video continues to spread like wildfire. Nicole told El Paso, Texas television station KDBC that she's gotten interest from such shows as Inside Edition and Ellen Degeneres.

Maybe it's time Harris markets an exercise video. Hell, it would be a lot better than most of what's out there.

Watch and see for yourself:

Dogs Top Notch at Running Free, Greeting Friends

It's been four months since Jackson the cocker spaniel moved into our St. Albans, Vermont house, and of course now I'm the worlds most hopeless dog lover. Always liked 'em, but now I'm obnoxious about it.

Jeff bought me this "Woof" sticker to match the one on
his Jeep, confirming us as dedicated dog lovers.

I'm given to heart-tugging stories about dogs, and every once in awhile, I post my favorites.

Jackson is happiest when he can run full tilt around the yard, chasing frisbees, sticks, bugs and assorted real  and imagined playmates. Almost all dogs are like that.

So now that a video about beagles rescued from a research lab has gone viral, I paid attention. The video shows the beagles, who have never been in the sun or walked or run around on grass, react as their cages are opened for the first time.

These beagles have since been adopted into good homes.

In the video, the beagles are awfully tentative at first, but they soon figure out playing on grassy lawns is The Way It Ought To Be.


One of my favorite moments with Jackson is his greetings. Whether I've been gone three days or 30 seconds his greeting when he sees me is always the same. His tail wags so wildly that his little butt swings back and forth like that of a runway fashion model on wayyyyyy to much speed.

He is bursting so desperately to greet me that you a high pitched whine, and then, the embrace. He jumps up to lick my face, then runs circles around me, stopping every second or so for another jump and kiss. These reunions are exhausting, let me tell you. But they're worth it.

It's just the way dogs are, but Jackson's greeting does feel like I'm being treated like a returning war hero, when in fact I'm just returning from the store with a gallon of milk.

If Jackson gets this excited to see me, imagine the excitement of dogs whose human companions come home from a military overseas deployment.  These really are war heroes returning home. To get an idea of that, check out this video VERY sweet:

A Spin on Leaf Blowers and Chairs?

Here's a useless invention that will have you spinning in your seat. Really, really spinning in your seat.

These guys rigged a leaf blower to an office chair, which sets off, well, a disaster. But at least it's a funny disaster.

People with time on their hands come up with the darndest things, don't they?

Just passing this along in case you're trying to find Christmas gifts for people you hate.

Watch and laugh:

Sad Thanksgiving Vermont Fire

On Thanksgiving Day, there was unfortunately a bad fire here in St. Albans, Vermont. A four unit apartment building went up in flames.

There's no right day of the year for that to happen, but Thanksgiving seemed particularly cruel. The thankful part is all six people in the building got out uninjured and there were no serious injuries among the throngs of firefighters who came from as far away as Quebec to put out the blaze.

I was there, and you can see in the pictures and the video how nasty this fire really was.

Thaw Creates Little Vermont Snow Creature

We had a little over four inches of snow here in St. Albans, Vermont the day before Thanksgiving, but warm weather quickly returned and the snow quickly melted.

A remaining pile of snow thawed weirdly on my front deck, creating the little snow creature that you see pictured in this post. A little snow dog, maybe? Maybe a space alien snow creature? You decide.

Black Friday Was True to Form. Sigh.

As I whined about yesterday, Black Friday turned out just as I expected. We had shootings, fights, pepper spraying and general bad behavior in the big stores as people stormed the malls, decked each other instead of the halls all to wrestled for the ten cheap big screen TV's that thousands of people wanted.

The money quote came from a North Carolina shopper: "The difference this year is instead of a nice sweater, you need a bullet proof vest and goggles."

Some psychologists frown big time on these Black Friday door buster sales. They know the big store owners know that if they create huge crowds and strange hours, cut prices to below cost on some items and only put a handful in stock, it will turn the crowd into a frenzy.

And frenzied people are obviously not rational. So they'll go into overdrive and buy and buy and buy even though they don't want and can't afford what they're buying.

So what if a few people get hurt in the process? That's business.

One of the best looks at this insanity/inanity is a video of a crowd surging into an Urban Outfitters on Black Friday. The person filming the scene is heard to say: "That's the dumbest thing I've ever seen."

Right on, bro: