Dolls Keep Getting More And More Nosy. And Scary

 Could hackers access voice messages left by kids
on this internet-connected cute toy?
Security experts say yes. 

Since when have toys gotten so nefarious?

In December, I told you about Cayla, the doll that collects information from chatty kids. This information could be used to target advertising, or worse, scam the kid or their family.

Now, we're learning about more dolls and toys that are just as cavalier about privacy.

There's a group of toy animals, made by an outfit called CloudPets, that can store and replay voice messages sent to them via the internet, says the Huffington Post. 

Often families buy these toys for things like sending hearfelt messages to and from dad or mom who might, say, by deployed in the military overseas.

The problem is, the personal information of more than 800,000 customers is now out there. These include some two million voice recordings, many of them made by children, the Huffington Post says. 

What's worse is CloudPets appears to some to have a pretty cavalier attitude toward the data breach.

Information like customers' login and password information and voice recordings, was in a database there for anyone who knew how to find the information.

Security experts like Troy Hunt ried to contact CloudPets about the issue, but never heard back from the company, the Huffington Post reports. 

The head of toy maker, Mark Meyers, denied that the voice recordings were stole, says Network World. 

The security threat isn't huge, espeically if the passwords for CloudPets products aren't the same as users' other devices.

But the data could be used to push messages to children, and there are a lot of creepy people out there.

I really think we should just go back to old fashioned dolls that have no connection to the internet.

According to The Guardian:

"John Madelin, CEO at IT security experts Reliance ACSN, echoes Hunt's warnings. "Connected toys that are easily accessible by hackers are sinister. The CloudPets issue highlights the fact tht manufactuers of connected devices really struggle to bake security in from the start."

Madelin called the accessibility of the CloudPets data "unforgivable."

Time to haul out the internet-free teddy bears we got when we were kids, I guess.

Is This Doll Spying On Your Kids?

I'm glad I'm not a parent of young children.

Is this cute little computerized
doll named Cayla spying on
kids and saving their information?

Especially this time of year.  

So many things to consider. Is the toy safe? Will the kid like it? Will it instill the values we want in our children? Is it too expensive?

Unfortunately, parents now have a new, much more insidious worry: Is the toy spying on our children, on the family? Is the toy gathering intelligence on us?

This feels like Brave New World, but apparently, it's here.

According to Huffington Post and other news organizations, a group of consumer watchdog organizations has filed a complaint with the Federal Trade Commission, saing the dolls "My Friend Cayla" and "Que Intelligent Robot" have speech recognition software that gleans information from kids.

According to the FTC complaint:

"By design and purpose, these toys record and collect the private conversations of young children without any limitations on collection, use, or disclosure of this personal information.

The toys subject young children to ongoing surveillance and are deployed in homes across the United States without any meaningful data protection standards. They pose an imminent and immediate threat to the safety and security of children in the United States."

Sounds dire to me!

But how are these spy dolls doing this?

The concept of the dolls is really cool, until you think about how the dolls might collect information.

What child (or adult for that matter) wouldn't like adoll or other toy that has software that allows the doll to provide appropriate responses to everything the child says?

"Cayla can understand and respond to you in real time about almost anything.....She is not a doll...she's a real friend!" goes the Cayla advertising material.

I don't think that part of the FTC complaint iss the real objection.

But if you think about, as the people who filed the complaint have, this could be really underhanded.

Part of the complaint is fairly trivial, to be honest. Cayla mentions she likes the movie "Frozen," the movie "The Little Mermaid" and enjoys Disneyworld

The FTC complaint says that's product placement, and children don't recognize it as advertising.

That's probably true, but we're used to this by now.

To me, the real disturbing part of Cayla the doll is the information they try to glean from the kids who play with them.  Accompanying material with Cayla asks children to provide their name, mom and dad's name, which school they go to, their favorite foods and TV programs and things like that.

It's all about marketing and advertising, but it's creepy that a company would know all this stuff about a kid and her family. Especially since hackers can probably get in and cause all sorts of problems with the information.

Most worrisome, the complaint to the FTC  alleges the makers of Cayla, Genesis Toys, can record and store the information that the kids tell the doll while they're playing and conversing with it. Another company, Nuance Communications, allegedly stores the recordings for Genesis Toys.

The terms of use verbiage with Cayla, explains all this access to the information they have. But with all terms of service statements, this one is really dense and difficult to understand.  Nobody actually reads terms of service statements because they're so byzantine. and if they do, they reall don't understand it. I don't, that's for sure.

The Huffington Post and CBS says Genesis Toys won't comment. Neither would Nuance Communications, but they did direct media outlets to a Nuance muckymuck named Richard Mack, who wrote the company "takes data privacy seriously." and that the company doesn't use or sell voice data for marketing or advertising purposes."

Then why do they keep it, then? Part of it might be so the dolls interact with kids better, but I'm still suspicious.

Still, if I were a parent, I'd get my kids an old fashioned Teddy Bear or something. Call me a luddite, but I'm not sure I like this Brave New World of computerized kids toys.

Great Christmas Gifts For Kids! Including Winos, Drug Dealers And A Perverted Tarzan!

Ellen Degeneres shops for toys so you don't have to.
Or maybe you will have to shop after all.  

You might have heard about the Breaking Bad doll controversy. Something about having kids play make believe with drug dealer dolls.

Well, count on Ellen Degeneres to find more wonderful toys for your kids to play with. Just in time for Christmas!

We have the wino and cop dolls, the Tarzan doll, who, as Ellen puts it, doesn't really need Jane, and ET's finger, which has found a new way to call home.

We'll let Ellen explain it, since she's way, way better at it than me. Get your paper and pen to start making those Christmas shopping lists!

H/T to sister Lynn for alerting me to this:

"Charlie Da Dog" Helps Baby Load Up On Toys

Charlie Da Dog gives a baby back his toy, and then some.  

OK, I'm a little obsessed with cute dog videos lately, but I can't resist this one.

The set up is that Charlie the beagle, or better known to "Charlie Da Dog" takes a toy from the baby.

(The family is Polish, and I love how the dog is known as "da dog" because people with Polish accents pronounce "the" as "da." Reminds me of my upbringing in a town with a lot of Poles.)

Anyway, the baby starts crying when Charlie takes the toy. Charlie feels bad so he piles toys on to the baby. The premise of the video is that Charlie is apologetic for taking the toy, but I think Charlie has just been trained to do what he does.

But the true scenario doesn't matter that much. The baby and the dog are still cute, and Charlie is clearly smart and talented.  It's no wonder the video has gone totally viral.

By the way, Charlie has a Facebook page you can check out as well.

So for your Monday morning smile, here's the video:

Rubber Duckie Is Now A Hall Of Famer

Since we've been in a childlike mood all week, I'm happy to report more good child type news: The venerable rubber duck has been inducted into the National Toy Hall Of Fame.  

Ernie from Sesame Street celebrates the
induction of the Rubber Duck into
the National Toy Hall of Fame.  

Every year, the Hall of Fame honors toys and games that have become an important part of American culture.

The oh-so-serious game of chess was inducted into the Toy Hall of Fame this year, too, but I'm fixated on the more frivolous rubber duck

(By the way, if you're really into toys, here, in alphabetical order, is all the items in the Toy Hall of Fame. )  

The National Toy Hall of Fame said the rubber duckie first made an appearance in the United States soon after Charles Goodyear's rubber innovations came to the fore.

By the 1940s, rubber ducks had become a regular visitor and childrens' bathtime. Then Ernie, from Sesame Street, came up with a happy little ditty about how he was awfully fond of his rubber duckie, and the rest is history.

Raise your hands: How many of you had a nice squeaky rubber duck when they were kids? How many of you still have one?

Here's Ernie doing his classic ode to the rubber duckie to get your Friday off on the right foot:

"Much Loved" Old Teddy Bears Offer Poignant Photography, Comfortable Memories

Admit it.

Me, relaxing with my childhood teddy bear and
my favorite childrens'  book.  

You're probably an adult, and have been one for a long time.

But chances are, you still have the old teddy bear or other stuffed toy that, when you were little, could not be separated from, EVER.

And I bet you still would never part ways with Teddy. He's in your house somewhere, watching over you, protecting you, making you feel safe just like he did when you were three years old.

Along those lines, a photographer named Mark Nixon put together a book called "Much Loved" a collection of images showing very, very battered teddy bears and similar toys that had been hugged and hugged and hugged in times of childhood stress.

Their owners could never let go of these toys, even well into adulthood, and it's understandable why.

Here's what Nixon had to say about the project on the website BoingBoing:

"......I put the call out for people to bring in their much-loved teddies--the more loved, unwashed, and falling apart the better--to be photographed. I expeted it to be mostly children, but it soon became apparent that the idea appealed very much to adults, and that many of them were still very attached t their teddies. It was as though they had been keeping a long-held secret and could finally tell someone what their teddies really meant to them.

Their strength of feeling took me by surprise. While waiting they would tell some usually funny story about their teddy (How they had nearly lost it at some stage was a common theme) or would speak emotionally about what it meant to them. So the stories and memories became integral to the photographs, adding significance to them and bringing them to life."

Someone's childhood teddy bear
from the photography book "Much Loved"
 by Mark Nixon  

I can so relate to the people who had their teddy bears photographed by Nixon. I still have my childhood teddy bear, and I'm 51 years old.

Compared to the teddies in Nixon's photographs, mine's in pretty good shape. He still has his two golden eyes, and a brown button nose. His fur is matted with age, the bottoms of his white feet are dirty and his mouth is misshapen.

When I first had him, you could squeeze him and he'd say things like "I love you" but that feature broke a long, long time ago.

My teddy sits on a dresser drawer in the bedroom. He's joined by other child-like toys an items I collected as an adult. There's a stuffed Tasmanian devil, from Looney Tunes, that I bought more than two decades ago.

About four years ago, when I had to go into a surgery, my best friend Denis gave me a children's book called "The Gift Of Nothing" by Patrick McDonnell, which charmingly tells us the best thing we can give to our loved ones is time and friendship.

The book is most assuredly in that place of honor in my bedroom.  When I need a little encouragement after a setback that looms large but is really unimportant,  I read "The Gift of Nothing." It always helps immensely.

Lately, I've been obsessed with Minions from "Despicable Me," those cheerful, yellow pill shaped characters who happily soldier on despite all kinds of outlandish and humiliating mishaps

I'm not the least bit ashamed of having these childhood, or childlike items as important touchstones of my life.

We all have bad moments. We all have stress.  We keep our childhood teddy bears and add to our collection because we remember how we felt when Mom yelled at us, or classmate Susie said we were stinky, or we couldn't get the toy we wanted.

The toy panda bear photographer
Mark Nixon had when he was a kid.
He included it in his book "Much Loved"
which shows poignant images
of peoples' childhood teddy bears  

Teddy always made us feel better. We can hug something warm and fuzzy and everything was OK.

That's why a lot of us, as adults, have dogs, isn't it?  If I've had a busy, stressful day, I'll collapse onto the couch. Jackson the Cocker Spaniel will run up, leap up onto my lap and tell me to start giving him a back rub.

Yeah, it feels good to him, but it feels good to me, too. The backrub I give Jackson soothes me more than it soothes him.

It makes me feel like I did when I hugged my teddy bear as a toddler. I bet the you go through the same thing with your dog or cat, if you're lucky enough to have them in your house.

After a few minutes of back rubbing, Jackson leaps off my lap, deposits himself on the floor next to his favorite toy, looks at me, bright eyed and tail wagging and says "Woof!"

That means it's time to play, and chasing Jackson around the house with his toy buffalo or toy cow makes both of us feel great and erases any last vestiges of stress.

Just like when I was a three year old, and Teddy and I, climbing a small hill outside,  pretended we were conquering Everest.

So yes, all adults should have comforting playmates. They could be intelligent beings, like my dog Jackson, or an old teddy bear, or a children's book.

Some people might say clinging to such things is insane.

I say it's the most sane thing any adult could do.

I Love My Minion (And Other Crucial Toys)

I went out and got myself a Minion.

No, not a real one, they don't exist, silly. It's a plush toy, a one-eyed, yellow, blue overall clad Minion to add to my collection of other cartoon character toys. They're characters that for some reason I relate to quite nicely.

Me and my trusty Minion.  

Maybe my life is like a cartoon. Maybe I've got the brain of a five year old. Sue me.

Minions are those worker bees in the animated film "Despicable Me."  They're the always cheerful, sometimes clumsy, sometimes put upon workers who try to make the evil main characters schemes and projects come to fruition.

My newly acquired Minion  joins Beaker, the hapless lab assistant to Dr. Bunson Honeydew from Muppets, and the Tasmanian Devil, the tornado like, slobbering foil to Bugs Bunny, at a special spot in my house.

Call it my shrine, if you will.

What I have in common with these characters is they are simultaneously simple and straight forward enough, but none of them are easily understood, the way they babble on about the scary things they're exposed to. Their demeanor is a strange mixture of fear and acceptance, though they all have their own way of going about it.

But they're my imaginary friends, if you will, because we all experience life in much the same way. Yes, I know my life is real, and the Minions, et al, are just cartoon characters, but bear with me.

For me and the Minions, Beaker and the Tasmanian Devil, things are totally out control. We feel at the mercy of others, especially in the case of the Minions and Beaker.

For me, the Minions, Beaker and the Tasmanian Devil, things usually end up badly, but comically so.  Here's a video that shows the life of the Minions. They're obsessive like me, get distracted often, and things get weird, like they do for me. OK, maybe not exactly, but close enough

Watch this example of the Minions at work to illustrate my point:





It might seem funny or odd that a middle aged guy like me has an affinity for such toys. First of all, come on, it's not like I relate to them like real human beings. It's not like I have conversations with them, arranged in a circle in a playroom somewhere. I don't take them to bed with me like a Teddy Bear.

But all adults need a nonthreatening, non-human, not terribly complex muse to cling to. These are mine.

They tell me that whenever I feel overwhelmed, threatened, oppressed, I shouldn't get too upset. Their episodes always end in laughs, and mine will too, no matter how bad things seem in the moment. At least I can hope so.

Maybe I'll make the Minions, Beaker and the Tasmanian Devil regular muses in this blog. And I should bring back Darlusz, the ceramic frog I also have. I used to use him in blog, giving him the voice of a wise but naive Polish immigrant that lives with us.

Because sometimes made-up characters give us all more insight that me, or any other human can do.