Dale Hansen Explains Why We Love Our Dogs, And Each Other

Dallas sportscaster Dale Hansen with Miss Hailey.

My favorite local sportscaster in the nation is Dale Hansen at television station WFAA in Dallas-Fort Worth.

I've featured him a few times in this blog post because the man always makes more sense than just about anybody I've seen on television.  A couple examples of where I featured Hansen are here and here. 

Hansen is a gruff, no-nonsense type of guy that seems stereotypical of sportscasters. But he often goes off-script, commenting on things that might offend some not-so-thoughtful sports fans. His somewhat liberal views sometimes clash with those of conservative sports fans in Texas. Almost everybody loves Hansen anyway.  

This week, he did a commentary on the newscast that had nothing to do with sports, but one that I think everyone can agree with, that is a must-see, especially if you own a dog. Or, more accurately, as Hansen puts it, if a dog owns you.

On the day of his commentary, his bassett hound Miss Hailey passed away. So he devoted his segment on WFAA to Miss Hailey, and why dogs make us more human. By the way, Hansen's comments also fully apply to anyone who has a cat, or any other favorite pet.

While discussing Miss Hailey's passing,  Hansen tells us, "Anyone and anything you love will eventually end in tears, but it is the deal we make......You can avoid the pain and tears of losing a loved one. All you have to do is never love. I choose the pain and tears. But Dr. Seuss was right. Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."

Oddly, I think the world would be better off if we all chose the pain and tears. Here's the whole video. Worth the watch, for sure:

Sad Story Of Child Dying In Santa's Arms Proves To Me Santa Is "Real"

Eric Schmitt-Matzen, aka Santa, did a hero's job for a
dying boy. Just the dose of humanity we needed

UPDATE/EDITOR'S NOTE

This is disillusioning, but the Knoxville News Sentinel is now saying they can't verify the veracith of this story.

A statement from the News-Sentinel says in part:

"Since publication the News-Sentinel has done additional investigation in an attempt to independently verify Schmitt-Matzen's acount. This has proven unsuccessful. 

Although facts about his background have checked out, his story of bringing a gift to a dying child remains unverified. The News-Sentinel cannot establish that Schmitt-Matzens' account is inaccurate, but more importantly, ongoing reporting cannot establish that it is accurate."

If there are further updates, I'll either update or delete the post, whichever is most appropriate.

PREVIOUS DISCUSSION:

You know damn well there's a Kleenex warning with this story.

The viral story going around now is about the hospitalized child in Tennessee dying in Santa's arms.

The whole thing is hopelessly sad and tragic, obviously, save for one bright spot. The man who was playing Santa, Eric Schmitt-Matzen, is an absolutely beautiful human being.

When not Santa, the white-bearded, six foot one, 310 pound man is president of a company called Packing Seals & Engineering in Tennessee.

I'm sure he's a great mechanical engineer and CEO, but Schmitt-Matzen gave us all a welcome dose of humanity in a world that seems sorely lacking in that department.

There's a heartrending video interview with Schmitt-Matzen at the bottom of this post, but if it is too much to watch, what follows is a narrative of this simultaneously terrible and beautiful story.

According to the Knoxville News-Sentinel, the story begins with an urgent telephone call.

It was a nurse from the hospital Schmitt-Matzen knew. She told him to come right away for a sick five year old boy. The nurse told him don't even change into your whole Santa Clause outfit. There wasn't time.

I'll let Sam Venable, an author, storyteller and columnist for the Knoxville News-Sentinel pick up the story here:

"Schmitt-Matzen got to the hospital in 15 minutes. He met the lad's mother and several family members.

'She'd bought at toy from (the TV show) PAW Patrol and wanted me to give it to him,' he said, voice growing husky. 'I sized up the situation and told everyone, If you think you're going to lse it, please leave the rom. If I see you crying, I'll break down and can't do my job.'"

Venable wrote that nobody entered the room with Santa, but watched, sobbing, through a hallway window in the hospital's ICU.

Schmitt-Matzen continued, as relayed by Venable:

"'When I walked in, he was laying there, so weak it looked like he was ready to fall asleep. I sat down on his bed and asked, 'Say, what's this I hear about you're gonna miss Christmas? There's no way you can miss Christmas! Why, you're my Number One Elf!'

He looked up ad said, 'I am?'

I said 'Sure!'

I gave him the present. He was so weak he could barely open the wrapping paper. When he saw what was inside, he flashed a big smile and laid his head back down.

'They say I'm gonna die,' he told me. 'How can I tell when I get to where I'm going?'

I said, 'Can you do me a big favor?'

He said, 'Sure!'

'When you get there, you tell 'em you're Santa's Number One Elf, and I know theyll let you in.'

He said, 'They will?'

I said, 'Sure!'

He kind of sat up and gave me a big hug and asked one more question: 'Santa, can you help me?'

I wrapped my arms aroud him. Before I could say anything, he died right there. I let him stay, just kept hugging and holding on to him."

And so, Schmitt-Matzen, aka Santa, sent the boy on his next journey, whereever that might be.

The boys mother ran into the room, screaming, "No, No not yet!"  Schmitt-Matzen handed the boy back to his mother and fled the hospital in tears.

He said he cried so hard driving home he could barely see the road. That's understandable.

What's also understandable is Schmitt-Matzen considered giving up his Santa gig after this. He just didn't have the heart to do it.

But he did one more gig, which was fortunate.  Schmitt-Matzen said, "When I saw all those children laughing, it brought me back into the fold, it made me realize the role I have to play....For them and for me."

At 54 years old, I'm too old to believe in Santa. Or am I?

No, a fat, happy old man from the North Pole is not going to come down my chimney Christmas Eve and give me presents.

You can call people like Schmitt-Matzen what you want. Great human beings, Good Samaritans, or guardian angels.

Or you could call him Santa. This time of year, when I hear stories like this, I'm glad that Santa lives on, not in some hokey television commercial that demands that you Buy, Buy, Buy!, but in the quiet grace of Schmitt-Matzen, aka Santa.

It seems like there's so little of Schmitt-Matzen's type in the world today, in a time when people feel like they have "permission" to scream insults and threats at people they don't like.

I, like everybody else, shed a tear when I read about Schmitt Matzen and the dying boy. Not only for the context of the story, but because it makes me know there are still people like him out there.

Thanks, Santa.

Here's the video. (Warning, it's a real tear-jerker, but worth watching)

Bretagne, 9/11 Search And Rescue Dog, Given Well-Deserved Hero's Farewell

Firefighters salute Bretagne as she entered an
animal hospital recently, as failing health forced
her humans to give her a peaceful death.  

Recently Bretagne, a 16-year old Golden Retriever who was the last known surviving search and rescue dog from the 9/11 terrorist attack, died of kidney failure at the age of 16.

Truly a national hero, Bretagne, spent ten days following the September 11, 2001 terrorist attack site in New York, searching for victims.

In 2005, she performed much of the same heroics searching for victims of Hurricanes Katrina and Rita in Louisiana.

I love the way the New York Times handled a story on the passing of Bretagne. The newspaper treated the event the way the New York Times typically writes stories on the deaths of important and influential people.

After retiring from search and rescue, Bretagne joined Texas Task Force 1 and Cy-Fair Volunteer Fire Department, often demonstrating search techniques for people who wanted to learn.

She also frequently visited elementary schools to help first graders with practicing their reading skills, lending her ears to the childrens' stories.

Bretagene on the job in New York after the 9/11
terrorist attack, 2001.  

Bretagne became something of a celebrity, and last year returned to New York where she was given a well deserved stay in a posh hotel and given gifts, and donations to rescue organizations on her behalf.  

In the past couple weeks, Bretagne, now quite old, became ill and suffered from kidney failure.

She was taken to an animal hospital one last time, as it was time for the hero Bretagne to pass away. Firefighters formed an honor guard and saluted Bretagne as she went into the animal hospital.

The video of this moment is below.

The firefighters offered the same sad, grateful salute as Bretagne's flag-draped coffin was taken from the animal hospital.

Bretagne was a true American hero, and we have a lot to learn from her.  I wish more humans were like her.

RIP, Bretagne.

Jan Crouch, Televangelist With Very Interesting Hair, Has Died

I mocked televangelist Jan Crouch for her, um,
amazing hair and makeup, but to me she
was also a tragic figure. She died recently at age 78. 

The subject of what is so far, mystifyingly the most popular post in the history of this here blog thingy has died.

Jan Crouch was the subject of my February, 2012 post: "The Televangelist With The, Um, Amazing Hair," in which I contemplated the remarkable structure, if you can call it that, of her hair and wigs.

We learned this morning that Crouch died of a massive stroke at the age of 78.  

I guess it's a requirement that female televangelists have elaborate makeup and hair. Crouch's makeup, by the way, was as amazing as her hair.

Another requirement in third rate cable televangelism TV, Crouch became mired in infighting, lawsuits and allegations of criminal activity.

Crouch was the co-founder of Trinity Broadcasting, which pushed what is to me a very scammy sort of televangelism. Basically: Give all your money to me, and God will then reward you with material riches.

Though I'm not a Bible expert, I don't think that's the gist of the Holy Book, but what do I know?

I know it's mean of me to kick round Jan Crouch when she's just passed away.  It's true I didn't respect her.

However, I felt a bit sorry for her when I wrote that post about her hair in 2012 and I feel sorry for her now.

She seemed obsessed with gaudy, showy moneyed ickiness. I wonder if she was at all spiritual, and in her quest for money, did she miss out on what really matters in life.

At the end, she was estranged from much of her family, due to the infighting. Her grandchildren wrote pleading messages to her, saying that they loved her, but the grandchildren were kept away from her, due to the fighting and lawsuits about all the money the "ministry" raked in.

Jan Crouch's wigs were certainly works of art, of sorts. The artful beauty of love and compassion and just experience life as a human being seemed to elude her.

Which makes this subject of my mockery also a tragic cautionary tale.

Indian Bus Driver Suffers World's Most Unlikely Death Or Maybe Not

Crater reportedly left by a meteor in India. The Times of
India said the meteor's explosion killed one person. Many scientist
 are saying now this crater was not actually caused by a meteorite. 

UPDATE: 

More doubt is being cast on this story of a man being killed by a meteorite in India.

Indian scientists say there were not meteor showers at the time of the bus driver's death, so it was unlikely this was caused by a meteor, says the New York Times.

Moreover, NASA scientists are saying the blast that killed the bus driver have all the hallmarks of an earth-based explosion, and appears to be not related to anything that came from outer space, reports the New York Times. 

PREVIOUS DISCUSSION: 

If this report from the Times of India is confirmed, it appears a bus driver there died when a meteorite landed on or near him.

If this is true, it's a very, very rare case of someone dying in a meteor strike.

Indian authorities said a mysterious explosion happened on the campus of an engineering college. Investigation later indicated the cause was a meteorite.

In addition to the bus driver, two gardeners and a student were injured, but are expected to recover, says the Times of India.

Obviously, the people involved here were extremely unlucky. Deaths by meteorites are almost unheard of.

Confirmed reports of previous meteorite deaths are hard to come by. The Huffington Post says a meteorite struck a wedding party in Yugoslavia in 1929, killing one person, according to reports.

There were several unconfirmed reports of people dying after being struck by meteorites in the 1800s, but several of those proved to be hoaxes.

Supposedly in 1951, a meteor shower in Iran destroyed 62 houses and killed 12 people, according to Iranian media reports at the time.

 A meteor explodes over Russia in 2013. The concussion
from the explosion shattered many windows,
injuring 1,200 people. 

Again, the above incidents have not been truly confirmed as having actually happened. I

There is a confirmed report of an Alabama woman being injured by a meteorite crashing through her roof in 1954.

And of course there was that famous meteor that exploded over Russia in 2013. The concussion from the blast was so strong that countless windows blew out and about 1,200 people were injured, mostly by flying glass.

I don't expect to ever get hit by a meteor, but I'm going to be looking up so I can get out of the way, just in case.







The odds of a person being killed by a meteorite are as high as one in 250 million. You're obvious in much greater danger if you drive to work tomorrow morning.

Eww: "Mannequin" Was Dead Body

In the EWWWW!!!  department today, we have news of a couple Florida guys who were cleaning out a house who cut down a mannequin hanging in a garage and brought it to the dump.  

The house garage in Spring Hill, Florida in
which a "fake mummy" cleaners removed
was a real, and dead, human body.  

The problem was, the "mannequin" was actually a real human body. A real dead one, says the AP.

Police said the body was that of a 33-year old Spring Hill, Florida man who had committed suicide a few weeks ago.

Police said the body was in a "state of decomposition similar to mummification."

Israel Lopez and Adam Hines, the guys who took the body to the landfill, had thought the former renters in the house had played a Halloween-type hoax on them.

The two guys aren't facing any charges, but I bet they are SO, SO freaked out.  The pair have so far not offered any comment. None needed, really.

Incredibly, this is the second time in the past several months that a dead body in Florida was mistaken for a mannequin, according to the AP:

"In St. Petersburg, the body of a 96-year-old woman who jumped to her death was mistaken for an April Fool's prank and thrown in an apartment complex Dumpster. The overnight clerk who removed the body was fired," says the AP.

So if you're ever in Florida and think you see a fake stunt mummy, don't touch, please. You might get more than you bargained for.

Westboro Baptist Church Founder's Death Brings Out Class Acts

You probably heard that Fred Phelps, the founder of the Westboro Baptist Church died last week.  

Counter-protesters to the Westboro Baptist Church
offer a message of sympathy to the "religious" cult
 over the weekend.  

You probably also know the hideous group from their "God Hates Fags" signs and whatnot as they do their noisy, loathesome protests at military funeral, rock concerts, memorial services for gay people, where ever they can spread their, um, whatever you call it.

Their hate hurt, no doubt. But ultimately, nobody ever takes this group seriously, and the fun ways people have found to mock them are truly inspired, and always good for a laugh.

A lot of people have pointed out that Westboro has actually helped to advance the gay rights movement, because, fairly or not, it makes gay rights opponents look backwards, and a little hateful and a little dumb.

Plus the counterprotests tend to bring people together in solidarity.

I'm not dancing on Fred Phelps' grave, but I'm afraid I haven't been nearly as classy as some people in responding to his death, as you can tell by reading this blog post.

But I have to congratulate the classy ones, who show us how it's done.

Exhibit A is Judy Shepard.

Fred Phelps and Westboro first came to prominence when they protested at the funeral of Judy and Dennis Shepard's son's 1998 funeral in Wyoming.  The son, Matthew Shepard, was murdered in an anti-gay hate crime.

Judy Shepard was asked to comment on Phelps' passing last week. This is her perfect response:  "Regarding the passing of Fred helps, Dennis and I know how solemn these moments are for anyone who loses a loved one......Out of respect for all people and our desire to erase hate, we've decided not to comment further."

In Kansas City, Westboro held its first protest since Phelps' death outside a concert by the singer Lorde, said television station KSHB. 

As usual, a group of counter-protesters showed up. And in keeping with the classy response to the sad "religious" cult, the counter protesters held a big banner and aimed it in Westboro's direction. The banner said "Sorry For Your Loss."

The biggest loss for the Westboro group, and maybe our gain, is the fact they've drowned themselves in hate, which somehow transferred some measure of love to other groups.

The response by Westboro to the "Sorry For Your Loss" banner demonstrates how badly the sad group has lost touch with humanity.

Looking over at that Sorry For Your Loss banner, Westboro member Steve Drain said,  "I don't even know what they're saying."

Even David Brenner's Web Site Announces His Passing With Flair

Hat tip to Tom Bodett for noting on Twitter the home page of David Brenner's Web site.

Brenner, the longtime, popular comedian, died over the weekend at the age of 78.

If you visited Brenner's Web site last night, you get some words written against a stark black background, with a nice photo of Brenner.

Yes, that sounds appropriate for the Web site of a celebrity who just died.

But the words are priceless. Click on the image on this post to make it bigger so you can read what was on the Web site more easily.

A wonderful comic send off for a wonderful comic entertainer.

Coke (a Cola) Addict Dies of Overdose

Here's a story that worried me, since I'm a confirmed Diet Coke addict.

A coronor has ruled that a New Zealand woman has died because of a Coke addiction. Not a coke, as in cocaine addiction, that happens all the time. No, it was Coca-Cola that did her in.

Natasha Harris of New Zealand died of a Coke overdose.
A Coca-Cola overdose, to be precise

Apparently, she drank Coca Cola from the moment she got up in the morning until the moment she went to bed in the evening. It amounted to two liters of the stuff a day. 

Now that the woman has unfortunately passed, I wonder if Coca-Cola has noticed a corresponding sales decrease.

(Excuse me, I have to reach wayyy over to get another sip of my Diet Coke. I'm now doing it in the style made famous last night by Marco Rubio. It's a good stretching exercise.)

OK, I'm back. When I first read the story, I worried that my Diet Coke addiction would kill me, just like it did that woman, Natasha Harris, 30,   in New Zealand.

Reading the fine print in the MSNBC story, though, it's clear that I won't die immediately from this. I certainly drink less than two liters of Diet Coke every day.  True, it's plain Diet Coke is bad for me and I'd be much better off just drinking water. And I'm trying with varying degrees of success to cut back.

But, maybe this is just self-justification, my overall habits are better than the unfortunate woman in New Zealand. Apparently, she ate little food, other than the Coke, and smoked 30 cigarettes a day. Not a healthy regimen, if you ask me.

As for me, I love to eat. And a lot of it is nutritious food. (Friendly prodding from husband Jeff doesn't hurt in this regard) I haven't smoked a cigarette in a quarter century, since I was in my mid 20s. And I try to get a lot of exercise.

A major cause of Harris' death was probably low potassium in her system, created by all that Coke in coursing through her veins. The caffeine likely didn't help either. All this can cause heart function abnormalities, which can prove fatal, according to the coronor, as quoted in the MSNBC report.

As for the Coca Cola company, they say their product is safe, but do not that hugely excessive consumption of Coke, or water, or anything else for that matter, can be dangerous.

Stiill, the Coke death overdose news is slightly unnerving. Now that I've finished my latest Diet Coke,  I might hold off on getting another one for as long as possible.

OK, what did I do with that water bottle?