Friday, April 18, 2014

The Scariest, Funniest, Best Political Campaign Jingle EVER

I know almost nothing about the Republican primary race in Mississippi between U.S. Sen. Thad Cochran and his challenger Chris McDaniel.   
Supporters of Tea Party backed Mississippi U.S. Senate
candidate Chris McDaniel sing his praises, spectacularly. 

I only know they're both pretty conservative, as you'd expect among Mississippi conservatives, and that McDaniel is a Tea Party favorite.

What I do know is my reaction to a video backers of McDaniel put out by a group called the Boomers.

The hair styling is my favorite part. The guys with their sunglasses and strange melding of Elvis and the Beatles on their heads is one thing.

But the women! I'm not sure whether they're actually drag queens, but I doubt a conservative like McDaniel would hire drag queens to promote his candidacy.

I like the setting with the gazebo, too. You're suppose to think "Old Time Mississippi," but doesn't the heavy car traffic and the gas station in the background ruin the effect?

I'm being critical, I know. The Boomers sure do have some enthusiasm, so I have to give them a lot of credit for putting it out there. Good for them!

It is truely a work of art. Skip past the really, really bad acting for the first minute and enjoy the spectacle. I sure did!

79-Year-Old Salsa Dance Now Wowing The World

One of the biggest viral videos this year is one that came out this month: It shows acrobatic salsa dancer Paddy Jones, and her partner Nico on the show "Britain's Got Talent."  
Paddy Jones and her dance partner Nico om
"Britain's Got Talent."  

Jones is 79 years old.

And amazing.

She already holds the Guinness World Record title as the oldest acrobatic salsa dancer and has already won a number of talent shows.

But her star turn on "Britain's Got Talent" and the rather moving give and take between the judges and Jones is taking the world by storm.

She's more proof that talent and fitness and poise is for people of any age.

This is especially true in the video after Simon Cowell prematurely pressed his "reject" button before the performance really got off the ground.

He regretted the reject and happily praised Jones' performance.

Watch and dance along with Paddy Jones:

Thursday, April 17, 2014

An Excellent Reason To Hate Cheerios, Betty Crocker And Nature Valley

Whatever you do, don't say on Facebook or Twitter that you like Cheerios or any other product made by General Mills.  
With parent company General Mills
new "arbitration" agreement, Cheerios
suddenly taste like crap to me.  

Don't download or obtain any of their coupons. Pretend they don't exist. At least on line.  Don't do anything that has to do with Betty Crocker. She's now a scary whore, her owner/pimp is General Mills.

Nature Valley? Well, the parent company is a valley all right.

Why am I going off on these products so badly?

In the latest scumbag corporate move, General Mills says if you have any interaction with them like I've just described, you can't sue them for any reason, says the New York Times. 

You'd instead have to go to arbitration sessions set up by General Mills, and the deck will be so stacked against you, you probably won't win.

True, it's unlikely General Mills will do anything that will make you want or need to sue them.

But what if glass shards somehow end up in your bowl of Cheerios? What if you have a raging peanut allergy, and the General Mills box says there are no peanuts in the ingredients, but yet there are?

Well, you're screwed. And not just health wise. If you previously "liked" Cheerios on Facebook, General Mills will tell you to go pound sand if you get very sick or die from using eating their products.

Yeah, General Mills, in typical Big Corporate Speak, says they're doing you a favor because if something goes wrong you won't have to go through the pain and trouble of hiring a lawyer.

Actually, no. They're just trying not to get sued, to save their bottom line.

So much for the goodwill General Mills generated with their multi-racial family commercials.

(UPDATE: Amid the swirl of bad publicity over this Thursday night, General Mills said merely liking them on Facebook or Twitter won't stop you from suing. But as the New York Times pointed out Friday, the policy is muddled and can be interpreted as a ban on suing the company. )

Now back to our regularly scheduled rant:

You could boycott General Mills, but other companies might be doing this too, although the New York Times said this is the first major food company to pull this stunt.

These "you can't sue because you interacted with us" clauses are buried in a lot of credit card and on line companies' terms of agreement verbiage.

You've seen those terms of agreement. Pages and pages of legalese that nobody has the time or wherewithal to read. So you just sign up.

These companies know it's not humanly possible to wade through these long legal tracts. They could make them simple and easy to read. But that would defeat the purpose. The terms of agreement are not designed to lay out what you can and cannot buy.

They're designed to be daunting so you don't read them. Like I said, corporate scumbags trying to squeeze every penny out of you, and preventing you from getting relief if their product injures you or screws up your life.

Some states don't really let these clauses hold much water and you still might be able to sue, but some "pro business" states say they're fine. Because corporations NEVER do anything wrong and people who get injured by companies are just lazy losers trying to get a quick buck.

Yes, there is such a thing as a frivolous lawsuit, but there's also such a thing as a legit one.

But the deck is getting more and more stacked against you. A Whataburger joint in Texas even put up a notice that you can't sue, you have to go to faux arbitration if you just step into the place, says Mother Jones. 

If a company injures you through neglect or malfeasance, you're on your own, pal.

I'm sure as hell NOT going to have Cheerios for breakfast tomorrow. And probably not ever.


Eyewitless News: Compilation Of The Best TV News Interviews

Every time something happens, the TV news crews show up to interview eyewitnesses to tell them what happened.
This surfer dude in a big bad storm is one of several
colorful interviewees local news reporters captured.

Every once in awhile you get a gem

So, as a rainy/snowy/floody day time waster watch this compilation of the best eyewitnesses on the news we've ever seen.

The compilation is even entertaining DESPITE the obnoxious ad that pops in the middle and won't go away.


Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Dream On: Steve Tyler, Aerosmith, Do Great Boston Strong Tribute On Annivesary

I've never been a big Aerosmith fan.
Steve Tyler and Joe Perry of Aerosmith, along with the
Southern California Children's Chorus, pay
tribute to the Boston Marathon bombing victims 

Don't get me wrong, I totally respect the band and lead singer Steve Tyler. But Aerosmith is just not totally my cup of tea.

But their tribute to the Boston Marathon bombings on the one year annivesary of the attack I think increases everybody's fandom, and respect for Aerosmith.

Tyler and Joe Perry of Aerosmith put together a video of their signature song "Dream On" from 1973 as a tribute to the Boston Strong people who were there that day, and everyone that supports them.

It doesn't hurt that they get an assist from the Southern California Children's Chorus with this.

Aerosmith is almost as synonymous to Boston as the Old North Church, Fenway Park, and Faneuil Hall, so it fits that they would do this.

The tribute is done with class and style, in Tyler and Perry's own fashion. So, in the spirit of Boston Strong, here's the excellent video:

World's Worst Young Woman Super Mad At Cyclist She Hit Because She Was Texting While Driving

I nominate Kimberley Davis, 21, of Australia as the worst young woman on the planet.
This church sign is a fitting illustration
for this post, but I don't think Kimberley Davis
is good enough to meet Jesus.  

I say this because she was texting with seven different phone numbers as she drove through a small town in western Australia.

She hit and seriously injured a cyclist, local police said, according to the Australian newspaper The Standard.

The lovely Kimberley's reaction was as follows:  "I just don't care because I've already been through a lot of bullshit and my car is like pretty expensive and now I have to fix it."

She continued: "I'm kind of pissed off that the cyclist has hit the side of my car. I don't agree that people and texting could hit a cyclist."

Police said Kimberley was "nice" enough to call emergency responders to the accident scene, but refused to help the injured cyclist and left him lying on the side of the road.

A judge fined our um, fine young woman $4,500 and took her driver's license away for nine months.

The cyclist suffered a broken spine and other injuries. There were fears he'd be left a paraplegic, but he is recovering and is walking.

As for Kimberley, the most fitting punishment would have been to ban her from ever again touching a smart phone. She's too dumb for one.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

A Surprise, Wonderful, Cinematic Firestone Tire Ad Makes Me Happy

As I always do in those rare instances when somebody manages to produce an advertisement that's actually compelling and well made, I must give props today to Firestone Tires and their ad agency Leo Burnett Chicago    
Add caption

Last night, while watching "The Voice" and trying to ignore the boring people in commercials yell at me to buy clothes and cars, Firestone got my attention right away.

I saw a young guy adding gasoline to the tank of a battered old pickup truck with really nice tires in the middle of nowhere in some dusty place in the American west.

A country singer on the radio warbles "True love will find you in the end." then the young guy cuts the music and the engine as he comes to an abrupt stop at a tired, weather beaten farm house.

We see a woman in a bride's dress, carrying a hound dog run out of the house and into the guy's truck as they make their escape to elope. This scene is interspersed with glimpses of a middle aged couple in their own battered vehicle (again with great tires!) leave a store that's seen better days to go home.

The two vehicles, with the eloping couple in one, and the parents, the middle aged couple, in the other then meet on a road.  (I won't give away the ending. You'll have to watch the video at the bottom of this post)

This commercial is so cinematic and tells a wonderful story with so few words, it does get your attention and is really a work of art.

There has been a welcome mini-trend in advertising in which agencies try to tell a compelling story to get your attention. I hope this trend expands.

It's almost enough to make me run out of the house now and buy some Firestone tires.

Here's the awesome ad.