Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Is Britain's Headbutting Cheese Toastie Fighter the Country's Worst and Laziest Man?

You can always count on Britain's Daily Mail to provide us with way to wordy, but highly entertaining news headlines that beg the reader to continue on to the article.

The latest is this: "Love Rat Dad of Nine Children to Eight Women Who Headbutted Ex-Girlfriend in Row Over Cheese Toastie Jailed For Just 20 Days."
Worl'd worst father? Keith MacDonald of Britain

Wow, this guy leads a complicated life. When he's not screwing around without protection, he's fighting or doing a messy job of eating a cheese toastie. I'm glad my life isn't that complex.

Actually, it gets worse. Subsequent reports indicate this guy, Keith McDonald, fathered 15 kids by 14 women, and doesn't really support any of them, according to the Mirror

Supposedly, two other women are pregnant by this (alleged!) loser.

Now, I know there are some highly unfunny issues here. Domestic violence, irresponsible parenthood, irrationality.

But you can't resist the complete awful train wreckiness of the guy. The girlfriend in the cheese toastie incident said she just "hoovered" the carpet when he got cheese toastie crumbs all over the place, and that's what started the latest fight.
He did get that 20 day sentence for the assault over the cheese toastie. What the hell is a cheese toastie anyway?

A larger issue: Hasn't this guy ever heard of a condom? I know he doesn't have much money, having spent all his cash on cheese toasties, but condoms aren't that expensive.  He tells reporters he doesn't want to "get the snip"

He also tells reporters: "I can't wear a condom. I just don't like it."

Well, I don't like you, either, Keith.

Ladies, if you want my opinion, you can do better than this guy. Anybody can do better than this guy. He's not even good looking, for gawd sakes!

He's unemployed, too, according to reports. The Mirror says he told them he doesn't want to get a job "because it gets boring."

Now, he's supposedly finally being investigated by the Child Support Agency. And shouldn't somebody be trying to get him to find a job? If he's got the energy to have all that sex, he's got the energy to work, even if the job is boring.

Then the unemployment benefits could instead go to somebody who really can't work over there in Britain. What a concept!

MacDonald, 25, has been well known in the British press for a few years now. It's shocking that nobody has cracked down on him.

I don't buy some conservatives' argument that everyone who gets any form of social welfare is a lazy bum, but this guy proves that a few, at least in Britain, certainly are pretty much worthless sloths, at least if the media reports about MacDonald are to be believed.

If I were a British taxpayer, I'd be at MacDonald's house, shaking him down for a partial refund on my taxes.

Too bad stupidity isn't a crime in Britain. If what all the tabloids say about MacDonald is true, he would get a life sentence.



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