8th Grader Should Just Be President Already With His Candidates' Voices

Jack Aiello went presidential hilariously during
his eight grade graduation this spring, and
now he's a viral sensation.  

I didn't touch it at the time when a video you'll see at the bottom of the post went viral in May, but I now can't resist, since the kid involved is becoming a political sensation.

Jack Aiello, 14, became a sensation during his 8th grade graduation speech from Thomas Middle School near Chicago last month.

That because he hilariously adopted the voices of top presidential contenders like Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton, along with our current president Barack Obama

As noted by NPR, Aiello even got the gist of each candidate's campaign philosphy during that graduation speech. When he was doing Sanders, he said his school had great cinnamon rolls. However: "I do have one improvement for them, though: We need to make them free.

"Why should students have to pay for their own cinnamon rolls? Doesn't make sense. What we need is a cinnamon roll revolution."

When Aiello did Trump we hear: "Congratulations, you are getting to hear a speech from the magnificent Donald Trump. And let me just tell you that Thomas has been such a great school. Quite frankly, it's been fantastic."

When he moved on to Ted Cruz, religion naturally mixed in: "Let me start by saying this: God bless the great school of Thomas."

Aiello the captured Hillary Clinton's rising crescendo common in her speeches: Teachers at Thomas were "Our champions. They've given us the skills to get us through sixth grade, and through seventh grade and eighth grade and now we're going to take those skills and apply them to high school!"

Jimmy Fallon was so impressed with Aiello that he had him on his Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon.  Aiello played "Little Trump," who turned out to be the only person who could be (big) Donald Trump's Vice Presidential running mate.

Here's the awesome viral video from the graduation, followed by his appearance with Jimmy Fallon



And here's the video from Jimmy Fallon:

Wedding Save The Date Is Epic Action Adventure Movie

This couple made an unforgettable video
so that would be wedding guests wouldn't forget
the date of their nuptials. 

Most of us have received one of those "save the date" wedding announcements. Not exactly an invitation, but a notice that a couple is going to get married on such and such a date.

The risk, of course, is forgetting that date.

To combat this, couples could offer up an unforgettable save the date announement.

One California couple, Tyler Macniven and Kelly Hennigan, put this concept to a new level with an epic action adventure movie in which they "save the date" from thugs using such wedding staples as garter belts, thrown flowers and a wedding cake. (this one rigged with a bomb!)

This is so entertaining. I wish I knew the couple. If the save the date video is so good, I can't imagine how good the actually wedding would be.

According to the Huffington Post, Macniven offered hints at what the wedding might be like. "Instead of a cake cutting, were going to have a traditional cake explosion, where we blow up a giant wedding cake. "

Wedding guests will also have to sign a liability waiver for the secret hijinks they have planned for their nuptials.

Watch the video and see for yourself:

Against All Odds: Martha Stewart KILLS It Roasting Justin Bieber; Laugh Out Loud

Martha Stewart does maybe the best, and crudest
celebrity roast ever, and it is laugh out loud funny. 

Perhaps my least favorite famous person is Justin Bieber.

When a celebrity roast of Bieber was due on TV the other night, I practically ran screaming out of the room in terror at the thought of it.

Then I learned Martha Stewart was going to be one of the people doing the Bieber roasting. She is also on my Least Favorite List of celebrities. This was going to be grim.

Then, somehow, I caught a clip of Stewart doing the roasting of Bieber, and all the other comics and famous people sitting there on the stage.

It was brilliant! I found myself laughing out loud. Really loud. Enough to scare the dogs out of the room.

Yes, I know somebody wrote the script for Stewart, but she had the gall to deliver it.

Stewart's comedy routine was profane and big time crossed the line past good taste. The video is totally NSFW, and if you're easily offended, the video you'll see below is definitely not for you.

But for those of you who like a bit of crude, wildly funny humor, Martha Stewart absolutely killed it. At let me tell you, at age 73, she certainly seems to have some street cred.

I actually find myself liking her a bit more. Maybe she's off my list of Least Favorite Celebrities.

As for Bieber, well, go away.

But first, watch Martha Stewart be just perfect, but not the brand of perfect you're used to from her:

Richard Dawkins Reads "Love Letters" (Read Nasty E-Mails) To Him, Hilariously

Image of Richard Dawkins as he reads the "love letters"
or more accurately, hate mail from people claiming
to be Christians. They'r e probably just trolls.  

Richard Dawkins, the noted evolutionary biologist, author and outspoken atheist, doesn't exactly have a fan base among evangelicals and fundamentalist Christians.

This week, he appeared on YouTube reading the "love letters" from people who purport to be Christians, who believe God created the world a few thousand years ago and that evolution is bullshit.

Oh, and they really, REALLY hate Dawkins' atheism.

Granted, most of the letters are probably from trolls and not honest-to-goodness Christians. At least let's hope so.

My goodness, the profanity from some of these "Christians!" The F-bombs and other insults made me blush, and that's saying something!

But Dawkins' reading of these "love letters" is laugh out loud hilarious, especially with the deadpan delivery and dignified British accent as he reads the anything-but-dignified notes.

You have to admit some of the letters wishing ill of Dawkins are creative:

"I hope you are sodomized by satanic monkeys in hell."

Another letter ends "You fuckety fuck. God bless."

"Your famed intelligence is nothing more than the fart of God."

"Dawkins needs to be killed in a plane crash or a flame thrower accident."

Again, the video of him reading is totally, totally NSFW because of all the swear words. In fact it's not suitable for you if you can't handle a barrage of really nasty words.

But watch the video, and you'll crack up at least as much as I did:

Dark British Actors Reconstruction Inane YouTube Arguments Brilliantly

Dinner table conversation turns to trading barbs
about Nicki Minaj and One Direction in a
hilarious video from Dead Parrot.  

Take some distinguished British actors of a certain age, set them in a dark, gloomy, depressing mansion, film them in black and white re-enacting the most inane, stupid arguments on YouTube comment threads, and what to you get?

Absolute brilliance.

For more than a year now, an outfit called Dead Parrot has been doing these short films re-enacting these YouTube arguments.

The tenth one has just been released, and involves an, um spirited conversation on YouTube from September, 2014 on the relative merits of Nicki Minaj,  her song "Anaconda" and the pop group boy band One Direction.

These YouTube arguments are called flame wars, and Dead Parrot's take on them is the only way to actually enjoy them.

The setting in this video is a sort of Downton Abbey type dinner table gathering, only gloomier. I swear stupidity is hilarious when it's done by older, serious, seasoned British actors.

Warning, the language in the video is definitely NSFW, because of the swearing and incredibly crude sexual references.

 The dialogue will also  kill brain cells with its stupidity. But in this setting, you'll laugh your butt off, too. This is awesome.

Here's the video:

Live Tweeting The World's WORST Person On An Airplane

"Nadia" creating a flight from hell.  

Congratulations this morning go out to Ryan Case, an editor for the hit television show "Modern Family" who survived a four hour flight with the world's worst person.

Even better, she live-Tweeted the whole thing, and reading her string of Tweets is just perfect for a good Tuesday laugh.

Other than the fact that "Nadia," the World's Worst Person, was drunk and racist and loud and picking fights and narcisstic and everything else that could be wrong with a person, she was fine.

Hat tip to Mashable for collecting the Tweets. Just click on this link to Mashable, and scroll down and enjoy the Tweets. I won't give more away, because Case's Tweets are too perfect to do any spoilers.

The Tweets are comedy genius though.

The Best Video Release Yet in Weird Al Yankovic's Video Week

Weird Al Yankovic released a video each day for the past week of song parodies, including a grammar lesson set to Robin Thicke's "Blurred Lines" and a study in tackiness to Pharrell's "Happy"

A still from Weird Al Yankovic's crazy and
hilarious "Lame Claim to Fame"  video

The best one came out yesterday. It's fun because it skewers all those people in social media who name drop.

The slightest brush with celebrity makes people go gaga if they drank at the same bar Lady Gaga did back in 2011. Or something.

This Weird Al release is called "Lame Claim to Fame"

We get lines like "I threw up in an elevator next to Christian Slater," or "I have a car that used to belong to Cuba Gooding Jr.'s uncle" and "A friend of mine in high school had jury duty with Art Garfunkle"

You get the point. Who really cares if you once walked down the same street Kim Kardashian did ten years ago?

Even better, the tune Weird Al Yankovic uses for this parody is a lot like Southern Culture On The Skids' song "Camel Walk"

I LOVE Southern Culture on the Skids. I'll skip describing whether I've ever been in close proximity to them, in honor of Weird Al Yankovic's video.

Here's the stop action madness of "Lame Claim to Fame" Enjoy!

Laughing At Death: A Hilarious Obit Involving Farts For Ontario Man

My condolences to the family of Bill Eves, of Kingston, Ontario who died recently at the age of 76.

Bill Eves, in the photo that ran with
his spectacular obituary. He died recently in
Kingston, Ontario at the age of 76. 

I didn't know Mr. Eves, but I have to tell you, the hilarious obituary the family ran makes me wish I DID know him.  Anybody whose obituary mentions farts and Molson beer has my respect.

I believe in death with dignity, but obituaries don't have to be dignified, in my opinion.

The sometimes canned, reverential language in most obituaries is fine, but if the dearly departed had a great and unique personality, let that shine through.

Eves' obituary starts this way:

"Saturday, February the 8th, Molson's stock price fell sharply on the news of Bill Eves' passing. Senior executives at Molson called an emergency meeting to brace for the impact of the anticipated drop in sales."

OK, he liked Molson, apparently. The obit goes on to mention his successful, long career as a school principal, and his cooking, gardening and carpentry skills.

Then we get into this:

"Perhaps most important to Bill was educating people on the dangers of holding in your farts. Sadly, he was unable to attain his life-long goal of catching his beloved wife Judy "cutting the cheese" or "playing the bum trumpet"--which he likened to a mythical rarity like spotting Bigfoot or a unicorn."

Maybe mourners indulged Mr. Eves by eating a lot of baked beans before, not the services, mind you,  but the "Praise Bill Party" in honor of him.

Also in the obituary: "He also mastered the art of swearing while being splattered by grease cooking his famous wings. In fact, he wove a tapestry of obscenities that still hangs over the Greater Kingston Area."

They even thought to run an unflattering picture of Eves with his obituary, which you can see in this post.

I can tell the world is a slightly less good place now that Eves has passed on. And I'm sure Greater Kingston will have fond memories of Eves for a long, long time.

Even if people in Kingston are still holding their noses at the thought.

Cute "Puppy Love" Budweiser Commercial Is Sign Of The End Times, Says Wacko

A lot of you I'm sure have seen that "Awww, Ain't That Cute!" Budweiser Superbowl commercial I wrote about the other day, the one about the persistent puppy's friendship with the Clydesdale horse.

This guy informs us that cute puppy/Clydesdale
Budweiser ad is a commercial promoting
the Antichrist end times.  

Well, guess what?  What we thought was an adorable ad is the Antichrist heralding the end times.

Seriously! William Tapley says so! I has to be true!

Who the hell is William Tapley, you ask? Glad you did! He's this guy who calls himself the Third Eagle of the Apocalpyse who finds all these signs of the devil and all that taking over the world.

I want to believe he's just being a parody performance artist, but I think he takes himself serious.

He's got a TON of YouTube videos that are hilarious. (He doesn't think they're funny. They're SERIOUS, damn it! But never mind)

Anyway, the Budweiser commercial: See, the little puppy keeps escaping from its pen.  He's a rule breaker. That's a sure sign of the apocalypse. The puppy befriends a horse, one of the four horse of the apocalypse, you see.

WATCH OUT: Cute puppy in this ad is
really the Antichrist!  

The puppy is eventually adopted by somebody, but as the new owner drives away,  the horse and his horse buddies (Horses of the Apocalypse!!) intervene and stop this.

The commercial ends with the puppy, which is the Antichrist, triumphantly leading the apocalypse horses back to the farm, where the hapless humans embrace them all and live happily ever after.

IN HELL!!!!

Which proves THE END TIMES ARE HERE!!!

This Tapley video about the Budweiser puppy commercial is awesome, but it doesn't beat the ones he did  few years ago, that "proved" the new Denver Airport was one big phallic symbol, another sign of the end times.

Those videos were the subject of a hilarious CNN/Anderson Cooper Ridiculist segment a couple years back. 

But today's End Times subject is this dangerous puppy Budweiser commercial (Which has 25 million hits already, Yikes! We're all being taken in by the Antichrist!)

So here's Tapley's hilarious YouTube take on the puppy commercial (Hat tip to Joe Jervis' JoeMyGod blog for noticing this)

Argentine Coca Cola Commercial Is Hilarious And Perfect

Sister in law Donna out in South Dakota alerted us via Facebook to a hilarious commercial for a new Coca Cola product, Coke Life

I don't know if new Coca Cola Life is any good
but their commercial is perfect.  

Apparently,  Coca Cola Life comes with an all natural sweetener and the bottle is fully recyclable, so that's a good thing.

I'm always looking for entertaining ads in a sea of awful commercials and I found one for Coca Cola Life.

The commercial promoting the product in Argentina has little to do with Coca-Cola Life itself, but it's done so well, showing the disruptive chaos of family life for a young couple.

The musical score played throughout the ad is the song "To Love Somebody," the 1967 smash by the Bee Gees. It fits brilliantly, so kudos to the people who thought to use that song.

Stay with the advertisement to the very end. It's got a great punch line in the closing seconds, too.

Here it is:

Joy! Dramatic Reenactments Of YouTube Flame Wars Turning Into A Series

A few days ago, I showed a hilarious, faux high brow theatre reenactment of one of those stupid, immature fights from the comments section of YouTube.

Apparently, they're going to do a lot. Another one has come out. This time it's a comment war between two idiots people remade into high drama. A third character comes in to tell us about all the money he makes working online too!

Here's that great second reenactment:

Hilarious Instructional Video On How To Mess With Phone Scammer

A video a woman took of herself interacting with a phone scammer is totally worth a hilarious look.

Amy Wellman of Scottsdale Arizona clearly
couldn't believe how dumb the phone scammer
she was talking to was.  

Let's face it, most of us don't fall for scammers trying to get our bank account information, and the calls, emails, etc. are beyond annoying.

But the Arizona woman decided to have just a bit of fun with it. She scammed the scammer, who totally fell for it.

The woman, Amy Wellman, 24, of Scottsdale, said the opportunity to make a fool of the scammer was too good to pass up, says television station KPHO.

While scamming the scammer, Wellman adopted the persona of a not very bright person. The person on the other line was the one who was supremely stupid, given that she fell for Wellman's contention that the name of her bank is Piggy Bank, and that her mailing address is "Dickberry Lane."

In an airhead, sing song voice, Wellman kept interrupting the scammer with comments like "I'm going to quit my job now that I'm getting all this money."

The scammer warns her that using the windfall for illegal or evil purposes is not allowed, but assures Wellman that using the money to buy weed is OK.

The video is 12 minutes long, but it's worth watching for laugh out loud hilarity, and to give you ideas on how to manage scammers the next time they contact you. Here's the video: