Thursday, September 27, 2018

Classic Florida Crime, Classic Canada Crime

This advice should be obvious, but a Florida man learned you should
never bake cookies on a George Foreman grill indoors while
drunk, high and naked. 
Both Florida and Canada have reputations for seeing some of rthe world's most unique crimes and police incidents.

The two locations have crimes that are totally different from one another, but they can be entertaining.

The following two incidents perfectly tell us the difference between Florida and Canada. Let's start with Florida.

The headline in gets us started perfectly: "Naked man starts house fire while baking cookies on George Foreman grill."

Boy, you want to read more after seeing that headline and delivers. Here's an excerpt:

"When firefighters got to the home around 5:30 p.m., they could see smoke coming from inside. A naked man opened the front door, said, 'I'm sorry' and closed the door. Police arrived shortly after to assist. The man came to the door again, left it open and went back into the house."

Police said since the man showed no signs that he cared for his safety, they removed him from the house.

It turns out the guy drank two liters of vodka and smoked marijuana for three hours when he decided to bake cookies indoors on his George Foreman grill. That started a fire. The moron put dry towels on the grill in a failed (obviously!) attempt to put out the fire. The towels caught fire, naturally.

Somehow, the man was not hurt.

Yes, this is classic Florida: It's bizarre, and to most people there, the bizarre seems routine

Meanwhile,  Canada had its own quintessential crime caper. This one involves bear spray, a glass bong, inept robbers and an intrepid pot shop owner.
In this still from security camera footage, the guy on the right
wields a glass bong to ward off the guy on the left, who
is trying to rob the pot store with bear spray as a weapon. 

According to the CBC, a clerk at a Shannonville, Ontario cannabis dispensary used a glass bong to fight off thieves who were attacking him and another clerk with bear spray.

No, we don't have armed robberies in Canada. No guns. They use bear spray, apparently.

Says the CBC: "A security video shows the suspects approaching a man and woman standing behing the counter, then squirting them with what appears to be bear spray. The male clerk came from behind the counter and found the men off, swinging the bong at them until they fled the store."

I think of people who are involved with pot to be pretty mellow, but watch the security camera video below. Look at the store clerk's face towards the end. This guy is fierce!

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