Friday, June 12, 2015

Indiana Passes Great Law Targeting Left Lane Slowpokes

Indiana is the latest to crack down on
left lane slow poke idiots.  n
The state of Indiana, widely and deservedly ridiculed earlier this year for its awful "religious freedom" legislation targeting gay people who wanted to get married, actually passed another law that I love.

This one, signed recently by Indiana Gov. Mike Pence (remember that idiot?) allows police to ticket drivers who drive slowly in the left lanes of highways, causing traffic backups behind them, says the Indianapolis Star.

An amazing numher of people don't seem to understand that if you're going to drive slowly, you should stick to the right lane.

However, there's apparently a huge population of people who are frustrated parade grand marshalls: They're not happy unless there's a long line of other cars in back of them, so they crawl along in the left lane.

This is of course dangerous, because it causes other drivers to weave from lane to lane trying to get by these slow idiots, which increases the chances of a crash.

Indiana joins a number of other states in which driving too slowly in the left lane can get you ticketed.

There are lots of theories as to why people go slowly on the left.

It's basic selfishness. Some people like to drive in the left lane because there's not as many cars there. (They're all stuck behind the slowpoke).

Others apparently drive slowly in the left lane to teach faster drivers a "lesson." They figure the speed they're driving is the speed everyone else should go. "Why does anybody need to go faster," the smug self-selected speed arbiters in the left lane say.

The left lane slowpokes seem to be a pet peeve a lot of people other than myself. There's a whole website called dedicated to eliminating the scourge of left lane turtles. You can even order a mirror image of a "move over" decal for your windshield so left lane slow people can see it in their rear view mirrors.

Of course, laws mean nothing to our left lane slow pokes. I'm sure they'll these passive aggresive idiots will still keep put-putting along at a left lane crawl. Can't do anything about them, I guess.

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