Congress Pursues Grand Economic Stimulus

Going unreported in the news today is Congress's very big economic stimulus package that's unfolding now.

I bet you weren't aware of that. After all, today's news is on how the House blocked the Senate's bill that would have extended payroll tax cuts for million of American workers, and unemployment benefits might be cut off too.

U.S. Congress: Awful or brilliant?

Critics point out that such actions will not stimulate the economy because with less money in people's pockets, there will be less spending, and thus less economic activity.

But what looks to some like Congressional inaction could actually be a major stimulus effort. Think about it. All those millions of people who watch the news are learning they will pay more in payroll taxes, and that it looks like members of Congress aren't playing well with each other.

Many of these people will then throw object at their televisions in anger, breaking both the TVs and possibly the stuff thrown at the TVs.

That, in turn means that these people will go out and buy new televisions. And new stuff to throw at new televisions. This means consumer spending will go up, stimulatiing the economy. Isn't this a great stimulus plan?

Someone also pointed out to me that these anger-inducing news articles on television will drive people to drink and smoke more. There are pretty stiff consumption taxes on booze and smokes. The tax revenue collected from a boost in alcohol and tobacco sales will go into government coffers.

If this keeps up, these new tax revenues should erase the nation's deficit in, oh, about an hour.

I read a poll that said America's approval rating of Congress is 11 percent.  I think the only things Americans hate more than Congress are freezing drizzle, dog poop stuck to your shoes, and Jersey Shore's Snooki.

But let's change our attitude. As it turns out, as I explained above, Congress is brilliant! So go out and hug your Senator or Congressperson today.