Monday, January 27, 2014

Don't Bring Your Mother In Law! Buck's Furniture Is Closing

I've just heard the alarming news: Buck's Furniture, a Vermont institution because of its zany, shouty television ads, is closing forever.    
Part of the Buck's Furniture complex in Wolcott, Vermont  

For people outside Vermont and unfamiliar with Buck's Furniture, it's in a little Vermont town called Wolcott.

It consists of several buildings that pretty much make up the whole town of Wolcott. The furniture store has been there since 1957.

The furniture store is know for its ads with catch phrases like from this cash and carry ad: "Bring your truck! Bring your rope! Bring your mother-in-law to Buck's Furniture in Wolcott!!!

Where will we go to without Buck's Furniture alarming wordplay? For a Thanksgiving sale, Buck's informed us that their prices "stuff the competition" and implored us to come up to Wolcott to "gobble up the furniture."

During a mattress sale, Buck's urged us to run as fast as we can to Wolcott to get our bargains. The television ad was an LSD-trip visage of mattresses running back and forth across the screen. Buck's said we needed to buy the mattresses because they were "stacking 'em deep and selling 'em cheap."

What will we in Vermont do without the low-rent television ads that are disappearing from our television screens and radios. (Sorry, the car dealerships just aren't cutting it)

We also no longer hear on the radio from "Nina, the jewelry storah in Manchestah Vahmont." The low, gravely voice of "Ray, husband of Nina" sounded like Bernie Sanders if Sanders were a harsh right-wing capitalist.
A Buck's Furniture truck in Wolcott, Vermont.
I wonder if rope and someone's mother in law is in there.  

We still have the radio ads from Lamoille Valley Ford, but the guy who narrates the ad, presumably the owner, sounds too much like a way, way overenthusiastic member of the local Rotary Club, and I find myself turning off the radio station when I hear his voice. Sorry, guy.

So, I'll miss Buck's Furniture and they're ads. Too bad I only got married a couple years ago. I didn't have time to bring my mother in law to Buck's Furniture, like their ad suggested.

Then again, my mother in law, an extremely sweet, tasteful woman in South Dakota who is not prone to yelling like the people at Bucks, probably has no interest in Buck's Furniture anyway.  

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