Sunday, February 21, 2016

Somebody Has Made A Bot That Messes With Telemarketers, Making Me Very Happy

A great new business called Jolly Rogger Telephone
messes with telemarketers to the delight of
this company's customers. 
I'm a very mean person, so when I get a call from a telemarketer and I have the time, I mess with them.

I'm on the national Do Not Call list, so most telemarketing calls I do get are illegal. But that doesn't stop some unscrupulous jerks from calling me to tell me I need a time share, a facelift, or once, an offer for a Russian girlfriend.

Since I don't want a time share, facelift or Russian girlfriend,  imagine my delight when I read in the Washington Post about a new business called Jolly Roger Telephone. 

Jolly Roger Telephone is a robotic answering serve that wastes telemarketers' time.

As the Washington Post reports:

"Roger Anderson started the Jolly Roger Telephone, which lets users start a three-way call with the service so they can listen gleefully as the bot rambles on. It's designed to provide entertainment and empowerment for everyone who has grown weary of the phone calls."

The Washington Post goes on:

"In a typical call, the robot keeps the telemarketer on the phone for a few minutes, but in some cases they go on for much longer. The robot does this by cleverly exploiting a flaw in the telemarketer playbook: staying on the line if the person is agreeable. So the system leans on 'yeah,' 'sure,' 'okay' and 'yes.' In one instance, the robot kept a cable company on the line for 22 minutes."

Anderson told the Post that he's been stunned by how much interest there is in his new business. But I'm not. I almost want to sign up right now.

Says the Washington Post: "He dreams of ultimately going even bigger and toppling the global network of call centers. In his perfect scenario, telemarketing would become inefficient, making the call center business model collapse."

Which wouldn't draw too many tears from this writer, who I repeat really, REALLY doesn't need a Russian girlfriend.

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