Thursday, October 3, 2013

Don't Spice Up Your Sex Life On Railroad Tracks

A lot of those relationship magazines give you tips on how to spice up your sex life.
A great place for freight trains, not
such a great spot for sex.  

I'm not going to tell you how to spice up your sex life. You're on your own on that one.

But I do have one hint on what not to do: Your sex life won't get better if you do it on railroad tracks.

I know that should be obvious, but it wasn't to one couple in the Ukraine, who decided to try it. Seeing how the woman died and the man lost his legs when a train ran over them, it was not a good idea.

Obviously a death and grievous injury are tragic, but still, what were they thinking?

Even if there were no trains around, and you're not trying to win a Darwin Award, are railroad tracks the best, most comfortable place for sex? The gravel between the railroad ties, the creosote-soaked wooden ties laden with splinters, and the cold steel of the rails doesn't seem romantic to me.

And then there are those pesky trains.

So, I can't give you any advice to enhance your sex life, other than to avoid railroad tracks. And maybe freeways at rush hour aren't great either.

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